Scott Oldford Site

Tag: self-care

When Does a Writer Rest? It’s Time to Talk About Self-Care

Let’s start with some cold reality: My 2017 Q2 sales report is in.

I sold a grand total of 25 books, between two titles.

While my publisher assures me this is normal for a small press author between releases, I was somewhat distraught over this report.

There are a lot of reasons behind this dip in sales. As my publisher pointed out, I was in a lull between releases (my last true launch was March 2016, over a year before). Additionally, my personal life was in upheaval.

I had just settled back into my home in D.C. and returned to a full-time office job after two years of freelancing and flexibility. Additionally, a loved one was in the midst of chemotherapy treatments, and for whatever reason, the hubs and I had chosen to do an unusual amount of travel during this period.

In short, it was a busy and overwhelming time in just about every way. I was exhausted. This limited my ability to write consistently, let alone focus on marketing.

Sometimes, something just has to give.

There are a few caveats to this that soften the blow. I got 622 downloads of my freebie novella from new email subscribers during this period. Likewise, my social media following grew. And, I did the important work of finding a new, sustainable flow for my writing and marketing, within the parameters of my new life.

Amazingly, my life has only become more chaotic in the months since the time frame of this report.

So staring at these cold hard numbers prompted a question.

When does an author rest? And what is the cost?

At some point, I speculate that a writer’s platform begins to take on some of its own impetus, and that while one might see a modest dip in sales from a neglectful marketing period, it would be less significant.

But as a small press author early in my career, if I’m not hustling, the copies don’t get into readers’ hands.

That pressure is exhausting sometimes.

I’m not a machine. I can’t hustle-hustle-hustle without a break — and I’ve been trying very hard to summon the Energizer Bunny. But heck, even machines need to recharge.

Eventually, I must rest too. When I don’t, I start missing things. I make mistakes. My overall quality of work declines, and hard.

If I’m truly in this for the long tail, there is a much greater cost to not resting than there is to taking an occasional sales hit. Low numbers might hurt my pride, but if exhaustion leads to poor writing quality, there is no recovery.

No quarter is the end-all or be-all

This is about the long tail — growing a true career as an author. And if I’m going to do

that, I need to remain sane and release one knockout story after another.

Faster would be better, sure, but quality is my queen.

And if I go on trying to function on four hours of sleep, coffee and cortisol, quality is

just not going to happen.

So when I power down for bedtime or allow myself the occasional much-needed morning to sleep in, instead of write, this is what I tell myself when the guilt and ambitions start rising up.

Harder vs. smarter: Playing the long game

Work harder all the time is not an option. Thus, I must learn to work smarter.

My key way of doing this has been to constantly reassess what I’ve done and look for ways to do it better. I also constantly study what other authors are doing that leads to success.

For example, when I created my freebie novella, I intended to only offer it through my website. But my publisher edited and formatted it, and thus they placed it for purchase on the usual sites. It first showed up on my website, then quietly later released digitally, then in print, for purchase elsewhere.

If I’d really been thinking ahead, and taking the time to communicate better with my small press, we could have turned this into a proper launch instead of a gradual trickle out. Missed opporunity to gain some serious momentum.

Lesson learned: An author who is working smarter thinks ahead and sees this type of opportunity. Don’t ever let a new release hit shelves without a bang of celebration around it.

To take care of your author career, you have to take care of yourself

So as 2017 continues to escalate the chaos on every single front of my life, I’ve been forced to try a new approach: Resting. Looking out for myself. Slowing down. Saying no, sometimes.

It’s not easy. But it’s necessary. So I’m trying to retrain my thinking, calibrating for the longer target.

Call it self-care if you want. I’m calling it a strategy.

How do you find balance between your author work and rest?

September 29, 2017
Two Surefire Remedies for Creative Burnout You Need to Try
As artists — and by artists I mean anyone who creates: painters, entrepreneurs, coders, accountants even — we place high demands on our creativity. We expect it to be there on tap and ready to flow at a moment’s notice.

This is both completely unreasonable and totally feasible.

It’s unreasonable because if we deplete our stocks we need to replenish them. When the milk in your fridge runs low or your fuel gauge hovers close to red, you buy more. You fill up, no question.

Yet when our ideas dry up we moan and wail and gnash our teeth, but do nothing except try harder. And when that fails we stick our heads in the sand and hope like hell our muse will show up before our deadline does.

Here’s why I say you can have your creative cake and eat it too.

The only thing standing between you and the Nile River of ideas is that you’re not replenishing your creative stocks. You need to take a leaf out of Julia Cameron’s book, The Artist’s Way, and fill the well.

One of the ways she recommends doing this is by going on a weekly Artist Date. On its own, this is excellent advice, but couple it with regular digital sabbaticals and what you have is a creative combo, bar none.

As CEO of a busy communications agency, I’m all too familiar with the pressure that comes with the need to hit it out the ballpark on every single job. Finding balance in an industry where burnout and the death of creative spark are commonplace isn’t easy, but by utilizing these two simple tools I seem to have found the sweet spot between work and play.

Why you need to go on regular Artist Dates

An Artist Date is an opportunity to reconnect with your creative self. If that sounds too new-agey for you then think back to when you were a kid, always up for adventure and ready to take on the world. That’s who you’re trying to reach.

The older we get, the more we lose touch with our creativity. Suddenly we’re teenagers and looking cool and impressing our friends is more important than playing make-believe or drawing or painting. And then we’re in college, at our first job, and suddenly we’re all grown-up and doing important adult things like buying stuff and meeting deadlines and paying bills.

The biggest problem with being an adult is that it’s time-consuming. We’re always busy. Whether it’s work or family or kids or getting to the gym, it doesn’t matter.

The second biggest problem is that we’re almost never alone. For a lot of people this isn’t a problem, but for many of us, an hour or two of uninterrupted solitude is like a tall glass of water for a parched soul.

What is an Artist Date?

At its most basic, an Artist Date is where you spend two hours a week (more is always nice, but that’s the minimum) by yourself doing something completely fun and frivolous.

Rule #1: You absolutely have to go by yourself. You can’t invite your kid, your partner, your BFF or your dog along. This is non-negotiable.

Pro Tip: We can all benefit from time alone, but if the idea of this freaks you out then you probably need it more than most.*

Rule #2: You absolutely have to have fun. You can’t work, you can’t do chores, you can’t do anything that even remotely resembles a “have to.”

Pro Tip: If you find yourself trying to negotiate or justify an Artist Date that’s actually work disguised as fun then, again, you probably need it more than most.*

*I’m not judging here; I speak from experience.

Pick a time that works for you.

Look for a space in your calendar when you’re least likely to be missed (the kids are taken care of, work is under control, and so on). If getting your two hours proves tricky, bargain for it. Make a deal with a colleague or friend or family member and then return the favor.

What’s important here is that you don’t feel stressed when you take your two hours. You must feel confident that nothing will go awry while you’re “off the radar.”

Enjoy yourself.

This is your opportunity to fill your creative well, to replenish the stocks, and get the juices flowing again.

Make the most of it, but remember to have fun. You can do anything you like: watch a movie, go to an art gallery, browse craft shops, visit a market. Whatever. It’s totally up to you. The one and only rule is that it’s something you want to do.

Digital sabbaticals

As the name implies, this is when you set aside technology and soak up some real life. Shut your laptop, turn off your phone and head outside for a hike or to the couch with a good book (and perhaps a pile of chocolate).

Taking a break from being online is good for our overall wellbeing, but it’s especially beneficial for our creativity. We’re all so quick to talk about how we live in a world of information overload, but at the same time, we’re loath to turn it off.

We think we’ll find ideas there and occasionally we do, but more often than not our “aha” moments come when we’re in the shower or out for a walk. In other words, about as far from the online world as we can get.

We need boundaries.

We humans spend a disproportionate amount of time staring into screens. Be it the television, our computer, our cell phone or our tablet. They’re all devices that take us away from real life.

They have their place, absolutely. I’m a digital marketer, so you won’t hear me arguing to the contrary. But even I have to concede that we’ve taken the business of being “online” a step too far.

We need to change that, but how?

Start small. Like with the Artist Date, designate just two hours a week to being completely offline. Once you start feeling more comfortable, aim to up the ante. Go for an entire afternoon or evening, then a whole weekend.

Initially you might feel anxious, like you would at the start of developing any new habit. Things feel out of the ordinary, you feel out of sorts. Push through. The good stuff is yet to come.

Eventually, you’ll start feeling more relaxed, more in the moment. You’ll notice a free and easy feeling that wasn’t there before. That’s because nobody can get hold of you. Ergo, nobody can bug you.

Do these two things every week and three things will happen. Your ideas will start flowing again, you’ll be happier and you’ll be more relaxed. And all because you made the effort to take some time out for you (and your artist).

What’s next?
- Schedule your first Artist Date and digital sabbatical. Separately. (I’m looking at you, workaholics.)
- Explain your plans to the people that matter, so nobody ends up worrying because you’re MIA for a couple of hours. This will also avoid unnecessary interruptions.
- Have fun.
Are you ready to go on an Artist Date or take a digital sabbatical? How will you make time for these opportunities to recharge?
September 8, 2016
Why Successful Freelancers Must Make Time for Self-Care

When I first started freelancing, I burned out with alarming regularity.

In those early days, I was working part-time at a desk job, part-time as a waitress, and picking up an increasing number of freelance clients as I built my business.

The way I took breaks was by running as hard as I could into my own mental wall until I was too exhausted to work anymore. Then my body shut me down by getting sick.

It took more of these mental meltdowns then I’d like to admit to get me to think about adding regular self-care into my life.

But eventually, I got the message.

At this point in my life, self-care and time management are becoming an obsession as I realize taking care of myself lets me get more done while living a more-balanced life.

Self-care: Because your writing brain needs to breathe

It’s been months since I’ve had a major meltdown, but I still have a lot to learn. That’s why I called Ken Scholes.

Scholes is a writer with whom I’ve taken several classes. He wears a lot of creative hats as an award-winning fantasy author, musician, consultant, and father. Throughout his creative endeavors and all the curveballs life has thrown his way, Scholes’s commitment to self-care has always really struck a chord with me.

While for years I’ve viewed taking care of my own needs as a secondary to getting the work done, Scholes told me adamantly over coffee that working on your own issues come first.

“[Authors and writing instructors] Kristine Kathryn Rusch and Dean Wesley Smith told me at a workshop once that if you want to fix the problems in your writing life, you need to address the problems in your personal life,” he said. “The part of me that tells stories is the same part of me that solves complex problems. You can’t write a detective novel about solving a murder when you’ve got a murder to solve in your living room.”

Time is one of the most precious resources any of us have. And that feeling of time scarcity is what had led me to slot self-care firmly on the bottom of my list of priorities.

How could I possibly waste time going for a walk, reading a novel, or — heaven forbid — goofing off when there was so much work to be done?

But wasn’t my refusal to take time for myself just creating time-consuming health problems, not to mention stifling my writing?

How should we, as writers, create a foundational practice of self-care?

First, understand that writing requires mental and physical space

I can tell when I’m rushing through a project, whether on a piece of fiction or an assignment for a client.

My prose and ideas will seem shallow. Uninspired. Not only that, but my satisfaction with my work takes a hit because I know I could be doing better.

Writing is hard mental work, and it requires a certain amount of space to be done well, said Scholes. “Going for a walk is writing,” he said. “Doing the dishes is writing. Sitting and talking with another writer about self-care is writing. It’s not just creating words, it’s creating the space in your head for story to emerge, that Goldilocks belt where life sparks up. It’s way more than typing words because you have no words to type if you have not lived any life.”

For Scholes, that means both a mental space free from distraction, and also a physical space free from clutter. “If you have a clutter you’re living in, then everything becomes urgent and you can’t find anything important,” he said. “Reducing clutter becomes a part of that self-care.”

Schedule time for play

Procrastination expert Neil Fiore suggests in his book The Now Habit that people who schedule playtime are more likely not to procrastinate on their work projects than people who never let themselves enjoy fun until after the work is finished.

But for writers, scheduling play isn’t just about avoiding procrastination. It’s about keeping your mind fresh and limber so you can come to your creative work productively.

Before you fill in the time blocks in your workweek, schedule treats for yourself. Maybe it’s as simple as half hour to watch an episode of your favorite TV show, or walk around the block — or as generous as an afternoon spent at the movie theater or out hiking.

Scholes sometimes finds his own creativity by staging photo shoots with his extensive collection of Batman figures in his daughters’ dollhouse while they’re at school. “There’s a little four-year old inside of me that needs to be turned loose,” he said. “He’s the one that comes up with awesome stories to tell.”

Manage your priorities, both in work and in life

The Eisenhower Method of time management (championed by Stephen Covey in his book, First Things First) categorizes tasks into a 2×2 matrix based on whether they are urgent/not urgent and important/unimportant.

Most of the time, self-care doesn’t fall into the urgent category, which is why it can easily fall to the wayside in the face of “urgent” deadlines and emails.

But it is important. And if you don’t practice regular self-care, it will become an urgent matter quickly (like I learned over and over again when I first started freelancing). Making sure you’re eating right, drinking plenty of water, and getting enough exercise may not seem urgent, but those things are fundamentally important to your work.

Scholes has established his own set of priorities, and eschews certain tasks or traps that get in the way of his work.

Along with the usual culprits like email and social media, Scholes also drastically cut down on travel time. He lives in a small town about a 45-minute drive from Portland, Oregon, but instead of driving into town to see friends, he now invites them out to visit him.

At the top of his hierarchy? Nurturing his relationships. “People come first regardless of where I am in a book or a deadline,” Scholes said. “If my kids need me, if my friends need me, if my tribe needs me, then people are always more important than work for me.”

Over the past few years, I’ve learned that creating space to work, exercising, practicing self-reflection, and spending time with family are all crucial parts of my self-care as a writer.

When I notice I’m starting to shirk these priorities because of client deadlines and overwork, I know I need to shift something in my life to accommodate what I value.

As counter-intuitive as it seems, taking time for myself has made me a better — and more productive — freelancer and novelist.

What about you? Do you have specific self-care practices? How have they changed over the years? I’d love to hear about them in the comments.

July 6, 2016
Staying Healthy as a Freelance Writer: 9 Important Self-Care Strategies

The biggest myth about freelance work is that it’s not actually work — my sister thinks I spend my days trolling the internet and playing on Twitter.

Perhaps because of this myth, freelancers often don’t learn about healthy workplace habits. While there’s lots of talk about staying healthy in the office, what about those who work from home?

When I started freelancing, I wanted to improve my quality of life, work less and feel more connected to my goals. Instead, I found myself glued to my computer screen, barely stopping to eat, let alone get fresh air.

The reality is that freelance writing is hard work. It’s easy to become so focused on work that we overlook our reasons for going freelance in the first place.

Ready to add some healthier habits to your freelance lifestyle? Here are a few strategies to help keep you in top shape.

1. Minimize the time you spend sitting

As a writer, you probably sit and type furiously on your keyboard for hours at a time. At this point, you’ve probably heard that this habit isn’t exactly good for you. Here’s a great infographic that explains why sitting all day is hazardous to your health.

Consider investing in an ergonomic chair or a standing desk. Sound like too much of an investment? Make your own standing desk by following one of these ideas — some are as simple as piling books or boxes to the perfect height.

2. Sit properly

When you are sitting, be conscious about how you’re holding your body. Sit up straight in your chair, letting your head sit naturally on your shoulders without plunging forward toward the computer. Bend your knees at right angles and avoid crossing them. Rest your feet flat on the floor or on a footrest, recommends the Cleveland Clinic.

3. Give your eyes a break

Staring at a screen for hours can lead to eyestrain and fatigue, according to the Mayo Clinic. To prevent these problems, follow the 20-20-20 rule: every 20 minutes, take a 20-second break to look at an object at least 20 feet away.

4. Stretch after sitting

At the end of a long day, it’s always a good idea to stretch your body in the opposite way it was sitting all day. Open your chest by clasping your arms behind you and letting your head fall back. Lie on the floor and rest your legs against a wall, feet pointing up, to change your circulation.

Looking for even more tips to help undo the damage of sitting all day? The Art of Manliness offers seven simple exercises (that work just fine for women, too!).

5. Go outside

An easy way to take a big break from both sitting and staring at your screen is to head outside. Changing your environment is incredibly helpful when you need to work through a tough problem or come up with new ideas.

Set a time during your day where you will head outdoors, whether to walk, run, garden or meditate. By prioritizing and scheduling time outside each day, I help hold myself accountable to my healthy lifestyle goals.

6. Exercise

Whatever flavor you choose, from walking to running to Crossfit to yoga on your living-room floor, move your body. Exercise helps clear your head, boost creativity and relieve stress.

Schedule your workouts and hold yourself accountable to completing them. If you struggle to make them happen on your own, why not plan to meet a friend at a Pilates class or weight-lifting session? You could also consider joining an exercise club or Meetup group.

7. Hydrate

Drinking coffee is non-negotiable for many freelancers — myself included. But for all it’s great affects, drinking too much coffee can keep you up late, and make you jittery.

In addition to your cup of joe, drink as much water as you can. Dehydration can lead to headaches, fatigue or an inability to focus — none of which are good for freelancers.

If you find water boring, spice it up with some mint, ginger, cucumber or lemon. You could also consider drinking tea, which offers the comforting warmth of coffee and contains delightful antioxidants that pack more punch than water alone.

8. Set your hours

No longer being forced to work 9 to 5 is great! But do you find you’re actually working more since switching to freelancing?

I did, which undermined the reasons I wanted to freelance in the first place. The plan was to have more time to make art, travel and spend time with the people I love. The reality? I work a lot.

Decide how many hours you want to spend working each day, and stop yourself when you’ve reached your limit. Close the “office” and unplug. If you’re worried about having enough time to get it all done, consider testing a few new time-management strategies.

9. Separate your spaces

This tip can be hard implement, especially if, like me, you live in a tiny home. Even though I can’t have a separate office, I do make rules about where I work and keep that space organized and uncluttered.

Leave work documents on your desk or workspace — they don’t get to come in bed with you or migrate to the couch. If they do end up strewn about, make sure to put them back where they belong at the end of the day. You don’t want to be able to see your work at every waking moment — or you’ll be tempted to work outside your carefully set hours.

What’s your best tip for staying healthy and fit as a freelancer?

January 28, 2015